Saturday, 23 March 2013

Everyday is like Sunday

(Me most days and big up Skins!)

So, as you may have noticed from my Morrissey lyric, I'm not in the best of moods. I have been ill for the past week and today was the first day I left the house in four days. What made it worse was it was really snowing. As much as I love the idea of snow, when it actually comes I start to hate it. (Especially that I'm the most clumsy person there is so I fall over a lot.)

But not only was it snowing, I also had a lot of work to do. For my English coursework I had to do an essay on Waiting For Godot. As much as I love the play, there's too much to say and an ill person can't write a 1500 word essay! My dad obviously did not agree and thought I was some 25 year old with a PHD or something. Seeing as he is an English teacher I thought I would ask him to proof-read it for me. However, it took him all day to change just about everything. Don't get me wrong, I'm happy he helped me, but he is the most pretentious person there is. Basically, he was being a bit of a dick and in the end he made me cry. He always manages to do that. Then again, I find it really hard to take rejection/criticisms and normally break down and cry. If I was going to be annoying I could blame him for that. He's obsessed with Freud and other philosophers, and I'm sure one of them blamed parent's for their children's problems and weaknesses. I bet they all said it!

When I was in year 8 at school (age 13) I was part of this 'friendship' thing where we would look after the year 7's that had just started school. I thought I was doing a great job. I was friendly to all the kids, I played games with them and helped them with problems etc. But one day, I got a call for a meeting with the woman who ran it. She sat me down in front of her, just like a job interview or something, and basically told me I was doing everything wrong. (To this day I still don't know why because all the kids liked me) However, I was obviously doing something wrong. So, you've guessed it, I burst into tears. It was one of the most embarrassing moments of my life. 

I just want to do things right and I want people to like me. I know everyone feels the same but I bet most of you would be able to hold in the tears. To be fair, I've had many situations like this (one in front of my GCSE art teacher who was a complete twat to me) so I've learnt ways of holding back the tears. If you think you're going to cry, lift your chin and open your mouth a bit. You look stupid but it works. 

Seeing as you all should now know my obsession with Taylor Swift, it might be a good time to use some of her lyrics to remind me that everyone feels like this and that I'm young and I have the rest of my life before me. 
I'm alone, on my own, and that's all I know
I'll be strong, I'll be wrong, oh but life goes on
Oh, I'm just a girl, trying to find a place in this world

Taylor Swift literally has a song for everything, she just doesn't know which ones to release. (Listen to All Too Well by her - she is a lyrical genius)

Okay, I'm getting a bit distracted. What I'm trying to say is one of my major flaws is my inability to take criticism lightly. I try not to care but I do. I really do care. At least I have First Aid Kit (listening to them currently) and Taylor Swift to make me feel better.

M x

Friday, 22 March 2013

Friday film club

I love watching films. It's one of my favourite hobbies. I like to really get into another world that's so different to my own. I like to feel the characters problems as if they are my own. Most of all though, I love seeing what a director can do with their set and actors. I love when a director has thought hard about where the camera should be to create the best possible meaning. I love the way a director decides what colour the tint should be to suit the mood. I love noticing imagery in the first few sequences that foreshadows the ending of the film. It's lucky I do film studies then isn't it? I've recently watched a few films that have really made an impact on me so I decided to do a blog post on it. 

Rear Window

This is the second Hitchcock film I have watched (first was Pyscho) and I absolutely loved it. It has everything: love, mystery, murder, 'at the edge of your seat' moments. It's one of the cleverest films I have ever seen. It's about a man who breaks his leg and is forced to stay in a wheel chair and ends up watching his neighbours...Then he discovers something about one of them that leads him to investigate more about it. Also, Grace Kelly is in it and, in my opinion, she is the most beautiful woman ever. Her dresses in it are the nicest dresses ever (you should now know my obsession with dresses). What's also different about it is that the we are always in the same place all the way through. It's as if we're like the man guy (James Stewart) trapped in a wheel chair. And while he looks at all his neighbours (the set is incredible) they're always doing something and I find it so fascinating watching the world go by but they have no idea. Just watch it alright?

Mulholland Drive

Okay, so more recently (actually today) I watched Blue Velvet and I did like it, however, my all time favourite David Lynch film has to be Mulholland Drive. It's one of the most surreal films I have ever and I just love surreal. The story has many different plot lines that interweave which is something that I love in a film but is normally found in tv. (Which is interesting as Lynch actually wanted it to be a tv programme.) The main storyline is about a young actress, Betty, moves to Hollywood and finds a woman who forgets her own name and her past and everything so Betty tries to help her. This doesn't sound very surreal but just you wait and see. Lynch always also seems to have a bit where someone mimes a song (it's normally a Roy Orbison song) and it's always so strange in the moment. I love the way Lynch makes everyday things seem really strange because I think I have the same sort of mind as Lynch...which makes me seem pretty weird...

The Descendants

This film I actually watched a while back but it has stuck with me for a long time. Wikipedia basically said it was about 'the struggles with unexpected occurrences in monotonous life', which is a pretty much perfect summary. When I was watching this I was going through the same kind of thing and it dealt with it perfectly. Just thinking about it makes me feel a bit happier about life even if it is about the end of it. George Clooney is perfect and so is Shailene Woodley (look out for her she's going to be HUGE). Just watch it if you're going through a tough time because it's a reminder that we all go through the same bad things and sometimes we even deal with it in the same way. 

Some of my other favourite films include:
  • Midnight In Paris 
  • Love Actually                                                            
  • Bridget Jones' Diary
  • Notting Hill
  • The Notebook 
  • Drive
  • Anna Karenina
(I love romcoms and romantic films okay! No judging. Sometimes you just need a good cry or reassurance)

There will probably be more of these to come with what I've recently watched. Please tell me your favourite films and I'll check them out if I haven't already.


Wednesday, 20 March 2013

"You'll go nuts!"


I'm ill at the moment and have had three days off college so bear with me for this...

So, I saw this gif randomly on Tumblr (yes, I know it's from Sex and the City) and I must say, it seems to directly apply to me. Today was my parent's evening and I was pretty nervous. I didn't go, because of being ill, so the whole time I was waiting my heart was beating and I was getting hot and it was just ridiculous. I worried that my teachers would tell me off for being ill. I worried they would be rude about the work I had done. I was just worrying. I'm a big worrier. Anyway, so my parents came back and, to my surprise, it was all good. My teachers seem to really like me and they felt very sorry that I was ill. So, there was obviously no need to worry. 

But why as people do we always worry? In a few weeks time I'll forget about this blog post and will probably worry again about something ridiculous that in five years time I'll completely forget. But we all do it. It's human nature. We listen to everything in our mind and decide that nothing will ever be good enough because in our mind our imagination gets the best of us and, therefore, we start to worry. Really, we should be taking each day as it comes. But that's hard! I'm a seventeen year old. I'm going to worry. I'm going to be dissapointed. But I'm also going to have happy moments that I'm proud about.

For example, I was really worried about starting this blog. I've never done a blog before and I had no idea how to...write for one. I thought everyone would hate me or no one would read what I have to say. I may only have eleven followers (well actually ten because I realised you could follow your own blog so I did...because I'm sad like that) but they're all so lovely and respond to most of my posts. So thank you for that. Also, I was nominated for this Versatile blogger award! I know it's not a proper thing but now I feel like I belong to this 'blogging community'. What I'm trying to say is, I'm really happy I've made a blog and all that worrying was for nothing. 

So, I've decided, I'm going to try and stop worrying. I'm going to try and stop listening to "every fucking little voice that runs through my head" because that's never good and I'll just start worrying and then go nuts. We'll see how it goes. If you guys feel like you worry a lot then I hope you read this and thought, 'oh yeah, maybe I should try the same!' Well, if at least one person thought that then I'm happy.

Thank you for reading guys. I'm so happy that I have you guys and your wonderful advice.

The Versatile Blogger Award...?

Wow. So, I don't think I deserve this! (Because I'm really annoying) But thank you to rosieandthewolf for nominating me! (I also think your blog is completely versatile and amazing.)

The rules are:
1. Nominate some other bloggers
2. Let them know you have nominated them
3. Share 7 random facts about yourself
4. Thank the blogger who has nominated you and link back to them in your post
5. Add the Versatile Blogger Award to your post

My nominations

Seven random facts about me
  1. I obsess over so many things and go through loads of phases. This can be for anything, music, films, books. It's kind of ridiculous but surely all teenage girls do that? (Right now I'm in love with Girls, David Lynch and Lana Del Rey)
  2. I have huge crushes on David Lynch (don't ask), Andrew Garfield, Jesse Eisenberg, Ryan Gosling (I finally watched Drive yesterday...Oh. My. God.) and James Franco.
  3. I literally only wear dresses. I love dresses. I have so many dresses it's ridiculous. I like the way they make me feel and they're just so easy! You don't need to bother find something that matches because it's all in one! I'd like to think of myself as a younger Zooey Deschanel......
  4. I am half Cornish and have probably been to Cornwall way over 100 times. So, whoever says Cornwall is a holiday is wrong. It's the dullest place ever.
  5. Everytime I see one magpie, in my head I say "How's your wife Mr Magpie?" Which I know, is so ridiculous (and pretty bad for a feminist to say) but I'm actually pretty superstitious...
  6. I'm thinking of doing History at university but I have no idea what I want to be when I'm older. I can't picture myself in 10 years time, which I find pretty scary..especially when people I know seem to have it all sorted.
  7. I try to be all 'arty' and write poems, stories etc and I try to draw and paint and read. However, what I find myself mostly doing is wasting my life on the laptop. I'm on my laptop for most of the day. I don't even do anything worth while on it! I literally watch loads and loads of youtube videos and I write loads and loads of pointless tweets. I'm a pretty boring person to say the least.
Thank you thank you thank you again to rosieandthewolf for nominating me! I've literally felt like I've just started this blog and I'm still not sure what I want to do with it but this has made me very happy. 
Here are some pictures that are to do with my seven facts.

(The guy whispering in Andrew Garfield's ear is Jesse Eisenberg)




Friday, 8 March 2013

'I believe I am the voice of my generation. Well, a voice...of a generation.'

I got invited to an evening thing with people from college and I was going to go but then somebody made a joke about me and I got upset so I didn't go. And you know what? I'm so happy I didn't. These so called 'friends' always just make fun of me and I'm sick of being the runt of their jokes, so I decided to take a stand. Maybe it being International Women's Day or maybe it's because I'm tired of being pushed around, but I just felt empowered. 

Instead of going out I decided to watch my first episode of Girls and I really enjoyed it. I've fallen in love with Lena Dunham and I've falled in love with New York. I would love to live there one day, however, I know that will never happen. I also decided to eat my body weight in Maltersers. They were very delicious and just make everything better. Whoever said food does not give you happiness was a liar. Just saying. 

I've always felt that I need to be with someone. I'm not very independent you see. However, after today I've realised these people aren't my kind of people so from now on I'll spend my lunchtimes in the library and read a book. Books are everyone's best friends. The problem is I'm going through my 'no reading' phase. (It's when I read a bad book, give up and then never pick another book up for a few months.) Therefore, I want you guys to give me some of your favourites books that you think I'll enjoy and that I can read in the library at my college. If you do give me recommendations then that means you'll be helping me get through this year filled with horrible people and I will be very grateful. (I've just realised greatful is spelled grateful. I officially believe that I am a woman now - how did I not know this before?!)

Love you like the stars love the sky...

Monday, 4 March 2013

These are a few of my favourite things........

Seeing as I'm still kind of new to this whole blog thing I thought I would tell you more about me and some of my favourite things. Please tell me what you think! And if any of these are your favourite things then say...because I want to be friends with you haha.

Taylor Swift
Okay. This is more of an unhealthy obsession and I'm not entirely proud of it but I just love her. I must say, I prefer her earlier albums but I feel like my love will never go away. It's a bit like my mum's love for Kate Bush (who is also a goddess). If you've read my previous posts you will already know my love for Taylor is strong. 


The Smiths + others

Okay, so the reason I put '+ others' is because this is the music I grew up with and will always love, it's just The Smiths is a pretty major one. The Smiths are just perfect. Morrissey is perfect. He just knows exactly how I feel every day and yes, I'm mostly miserable. 
The others include, Bob Dylan, The Beatles and The Beach Boys (a lot of Bs). I think it's mainly because I grew up with this music but I just lovelovelove it and it can cheer me up on any day. 

(Look how sexy they are..)

(Sorry Ringo and George I just really liked this picture)


Other than just films (that everyone loves) I absolutely lovelovelovelovelovelove musicals! I can't express my love for musicals than like thattttttttttt. AHHHHHHHHHH. (I hope musical lovers appreciated the title of this post)
Anyway, I think I have been to see over 20 musicals in my lifetime at the theatre because it's my favourite place to go in the world. What's my favourite musical you ask? Les Miserables. Now, before you say "Oh, just because of the film." NO. Les Miserables has been in my family for a veryvery long time. I used to get scared (I don't know why) at the 10th anniversary. I've been to see it in London. I have the 25th anniversary DVD. And I've seen the film three times at the cinema (I will be killing the DVD when I get it). Eponine is my favourite character in the whole world because of how much I can relate to her (I'm always the girl that the guy never sees).


(Hold me back, I'm going to cry)

Again, I could go on (I have a lot of obsessions) but these seem to be the best ones at the moment. I also love a lot of actors.......James Franco, Andrew Garfield and Jesse Eisenberg to name a few. 
I'm obsessed with the internet...I have over a thousands followers on Twitter (I'm classified as a 'Swifty' i guess) ((you guys wouldn't want to follow me)). 
I obsess over things that I'm not as well. For example, I love vintage clothing and everything like that, however, I don't normally wear that stuff...I wish I could but I feel it doesn't suit me. It's why I love Rookie because I can look at their beautiful pictures, read their articles without feeling like I shouldn't be. (I'm weird I know)

I think I have room for a nice picture......
Thanks for reading

Ohohohoh. I love this book and always do this with it which is why this is my picture for today!

Sunday, 3 March 2013


It was my birthday party last night and other than some boy and his girlfriend crying practically the whole night, it was actually pretty fun. There was lots of dancing, eating, drinking and even playing songs on the piano and singing, very badly, along. We also became obsessed with lifting someone with just two fingers...I know that sounds very strange but watch it here and you'll see what I'm on about. 
My friend even made me a mix-tape with some of my favourite songs and Asleep on it twice (Anyone seen Perks Of Being a Wallflower?) Oh yeah, and she called it 'Perks Of Being Fab'. Which was really nice and thoughtful and I'm very happy.
Another friend of mine made me a card which included all my favourite people and things, including: Taylor Swift, The Smiths, Lana Del Rey, Samantha Barks as Eponine, Gloria Steinam, daisies, cakes and pictures of my friends. It made me really emotional for some reason because of the fact I don't go to college with most of my friends and I just really miss them. I'm so glad I have good friends like that.

There really is no point to this blog post except to tell you that. I know you won't really care but I thought I would just say. 
I have found some lovely pictures that I really like (I've been feeling very inspired recently) hope you like them.







As you can see I'm in a daisy mood - the best kind of mood.

Friday, 1 March 2013

Taylor Swift and sexism.

So, if you've read my previous post about music then you'll know that I'm a Taylor Swift fan. I have been from quite a young age and, not to sound too cheesy, but it was before her music and lyrics helped me get through quite a lot of trauma. Therefore, you can imagine how I've felt through the previous months of full on hate towards her and I can't help but feel so disgusted of society. 
It seems to me that views on women are going backwards. Children from our generation seem to have been socialised into thinking women should find a man, marry him and then wait on their husband and feel depressed, lonely and unfulfilled with their life. This is not how people should feel about women anymore! This is such an old view on life that we must get over. No female wants to live a life without fulfillment, so why hate on a woman who is being independent and focussing on her job? Oh yeah, because apparently she's had loads of boyfriends so that means she's a 'slut', 'whore' etc. Judging someone by how many boyfriends they have had is ridiculous and completely old-fashioned. So what if Adele is the same age and has a child? Stop comparing people. Not everyone is the same. Taylor is just living her life, whether that be with a man or not. 
The other question is, why should you care? Because people always said she was 'innocent'? Again, she never said she wanted this persona of being innocent, society just labelled her as that. So now that she's had relationships means that she's 'ruined'? Of course that's not the case! It's just because she's a female that people care. Harry Styles is 19 years old and has been seen with a number of females, however, he does not get any hate because of this. Why is that? Because he's male and males, in this society, being seen with many girls is seen as 'macho'.
I'm not one to judge but I want people to realise that the worst kind of inequality, in my opinion, is in the media. Females are constantly ridiculed for not being a certain way. Females are constantly being taken advantage of. I could go on. What I'm trying to say is that this needs to stop. Society needs to learn that men and women are equal, even in the media. However, from what I have seen recently, this is not going to stop all of a sudden and me, being the pessimist that I am, I actually believe that it's never going to happen. Well, definitely not while I'm alive.

I hope you took what I said into consideration because I'm sick of everything in the media at the moment.
Thanks for reading if you did.